so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
