he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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