Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
