If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
