sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
