The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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