So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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