I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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