she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
