Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
