dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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