It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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