Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
