dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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