scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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