ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
