If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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