Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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