I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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