You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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