RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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