so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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