im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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