Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize