Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
