i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
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i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
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I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars