I heard we made out
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Randomize
