Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
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