Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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