I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
