Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
