I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
