I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize