She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Randomize
