Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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