i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
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Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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