Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize