I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize