If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
