I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
