She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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