What did we do last night that was yellow?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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