I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
