i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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