im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
