real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
