See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
