thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
