dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
This beer is not sobering me up at all
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
