yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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